Welcome to my penultimate post from An A-Z for your life, discovering and revealing who you are today. There will be one more on ‘W’ and you’ll have to read the book for X,Y and Z.
Your values are the things in life that you hold dear: behavioural standards you hold for yourself and for others.
If honesty is a value then you don’t need to tolerate liars in your relationships. Your most authentic response would be to let them know that you cannot be in a relationship with them because you have found out that they do not speak truthfully and you are unable to trust them. Without trust the relationship becomes superficial and your time is too precious for that. Maya Angelou observes that ‘Courage is the most important of all the virtues, because without courage you can’t practice any other virtue consistently. You can practice any virtue erratically, but nothing consistently without courage’.
Values are linked to right and wrong and moral codes of behaviour. Sometimes we can figure out what we think and feel in conversation with others. This relies on having quality relationships built on openness and trust, as discussed earlier. Where can you start?
Start by exploring yourself and maybe your unmet needs, those which you would love to have in your life but have not been able to attract. It could be safety, trust, love and home. This could then lead you to explore the values you hold dear. My values are key to how I try to live my life. It is about helping people to live the best and fullest life they can whether that is through careers advice, therapy, teaching or writing. It is about healing our relationships and healing ourselves. I am saddened by waste whether that is a wasted life, skills, resources or opportunities. My values link to my belief that we are all created with unique gifts that we can offer to the world. This book is my attempt to contribute.
What are your values and do these help you to make choices in your day-to-day life? How do you respond when these are challenged?
I have come across so many clients who set unrealistic standards for themselves. Are they your own values or ones that you have co-opted from other people? It is important to find your own values to steer your life.
Leave a comment below and share your thoughts.
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