As we are deepening relationships, learning and growing we will continue to change. As we change we affect our environment and life becomes less predictable and more spontaneous.

When we meet new people we cannot know where they are in their personal journey and the changes that might be going on in their lives.  We can’t yet know what they might need from us, or what we might receive from them.

It strikes me that we need a great deal of understanding of ourselves, and each other.  Some of us are good at showing understanding to others and tend to value individuality and difference.  Other people like everyone to be the same, preferably similar to them.  But we are all on different paths in our journey of life so why do we judge others by our own journey?  Understanding enables us to be more honest to the variety of choices and possibilities there are without needing to feel that our way is worst or best –  just different.  Appreciate your uniqueness and that of others.

Sometimes we give a lot of attention to visible differences such as race, gender, religion and disability, but hidden differences can have as big an impact on our daily experiences.  Think of someone who hears voices or has certain food allergies and how they would experience the world differently to how they would be viewed from the outside.  With understanding we can find empathy for others and empathy for ourselves.  Studies show that when we are harsh on others we tend to be harsh on ourselves too.

Do you try to be understanding of the people you encounter in your daily life? Would you say you have too much understanding, too little or just enough?

Leave a comment below and share your thoughts.

If you would like to order ‘An A-Z for your life’ so you can work through it at your own pace then simply click on the book cover on the right or go direct to http://www.ana-zforyourlife.com and order your signed copy today!

If you are interested in my counselling services then check out www.envisioncounselling.co.uk and email me: shirley@envisioncounselling.co.uk

Rene Descartes said ‘I think therefore I am.’  As you can see from what we have looked at so far, to be really engaged in your life you need to engage your mind in thinking about what you do, who you do it with and how what you are doing lives up to your beliefs.

None of us like the idea of sleepwalking though our life. Thinking is important. It encourages learning and using our individual skills to resolve our own problems rather than trying to be like everyone else.

There have been great thinkers in our world over many centuries.  There are great philosophers, politicians, scientists and mathematicians.  There are those who explain how the human mind works, how groups behave and how to design clever things such as spacecrafts, robots and submarines.  Neuroscience is discovering more about our brains, how they work and the potential for change.

We need to trust ourselves to believe we can solve our issues.  So many people have been told they are no good that they no longer trust themselves, which means that they are always looking outside themselves for their answers.  In my work as a counsellor I try to help people in growing their self-esteem and confidence so that they can trust themselves.  It takes time, mostly undoing all the negative comments they have received in their life to date, but it is possible.

Could you be making more of your capacity to think?  Are you continuing to develop by learning new things? Leave a comment below and share your thoughts.

If you would like to order ‘An A-Z for your life’ so you can work through it at your own pace then simply click on the book cover on the right or go direct to http://www.ana-zforyourlife.com and order your signed copy today!

In order for us to begin to look internally we really need to feel safe.  From a place of safety we can look within at who we are and reach out to others in the knowledge that we can meet with them authentically.

Safety is crucial to our personal development. If you feel unsafe in your current situation I hope you can make changes so that your circumstances become safer.  Hopefully there is someone you can speak to who can support you in this.

Safety and food are amongst our basic needs.  Abraham Maslow refers to this in his hierarchy of needs.  He suggests that once we meet these basic needs, then we can work our way through our belonging and esteem needs. He sees the pinnacle as self-actualisation when we are achieving our full potential.

The bigger picture is about helping to make the world safer for all of us.  Certainly life has always had its fair share of danger but the possibilities seem to be changing all the time.  I am unlikely to be attacked by a wild animal or die of malaria but, unfortunately, I can easily be caught up in a traffic accident.  The people we know and listen to affect how safe we feel but we can’t really hide ourselves away from reality.   For me it is about making the best judgement I can, when considering activities, associated risks and pleasure.  There is no point trying to be completely safe but not living.

Many people are keen on taking bodily risks with adrenaline fuelled activities.  The body responds to the unnaturalness of the activity (e.g. bungee jumping) but the organised nature of the event means that it is likely to be safe.  This can be seen more like the organised play I mentioned earlier.  I confess to being scared of participating in many of these activities although  recently I pushed myself beyond my comfort zone in a water park; water was inhaled!

How do you feel about your own safety?  Is it something you worry about or does it not impact on your thoughts at all?  If you live in fear how is that affecting your life?  Is there anything or anyone that could help you to feel safer so that you can participate in life more fully?

So my alphabet soup of life is almost complete.  If you would like to order the book and work through it at your own pace then simply click on the book cover on the right or go direct to http://www.ana-zforyourlife.com and order your signed copy!