Well no doubt you are beginning to feel that life really takes effort and energy.  It does but it can be a cyclical process where the energy supports the effort and such effort encourages more energetic responses.

It is about the energy we give off when we meet others and that which we pick up from them.  We have our own natural energy levels but that gets drained when we are surrounded by people, places or things that do not encourage us to reveal who we are.  A lifetime of that could really take its toll and leave a person feeling completely depleted.  In such circumstances a recharge is necessary before any energy could be found, let alone emitted.  So if all this sounds too heavy and laborious, maybe you need a retreat, a chance to rediscover yourself and what you want to put into and get out of life.

Think of your favourite person – how would you describe the energy they give off when you are with them?  What about your least favourite person – what is their energy like?   And what about you – how would others experience your energy or lack of?

Effort can have a bad name but there is nothing wrong in trying to achieve something.  Most of us admire people who build something from nothing through their own effort.  I am not suggesting forcing ourselves to be constantly heroic by ignoring our human frailty but success after effort can be very good for self-esteem and brings about a sense of empowerment.  I remember how great I felt after passing my driving test having had several attempts.  Although I found it more difficult than academic study I knew it was important for a more confident adult life.  It gives me more options about what, when and how I participate in the world.  Both energy and effort helps to move our life forward rather than allowing us to stay in some early form of development for our whole life.  Life has a lot to offer but generally things tend not to fall into our laps.  Although it may seem so for others that is not the case.  Apart from winning a lottery most people work hard to get somewhere or to stay somewhere.

Are there any issues in your life you have ignored or avoided because you did not want to put in the effort?  Was this from a real need to protect yourself or some less admirable reason?  Is there anything you would like in your life now if only you could put the effort in? Leave a comment to share how you experience effort and energy.

Sadly for all of us dying is an aspect of living.  It is inevitable, regardless of our attitudes, behaviour or caring.  None of us are infinite.  Death comes, whether slow or fast, gentle or chaotic, expected or shocking.

So how do we live with this certainty?  For me, this is something that has changed over time.  Although I have always known that young people could die, the experience of my family and friends has always been that one got old and then one died.  Then my youngest sister passed away very suddenly.  What is that about?  What does it mean?  What am I here for?  What shall I do with this time?  This was my specific process in facing my newfound conscious awareness of my future death.  Of course, we will not mourn our own death, others will.

What would you like to offer to the world, to leave behind before that fateful day?  Now is the time to start thinking about this.  For me it does not mean being depressed or particularly serious but recognising that we cannot take our life for granted so we need to prioritise what we would like to do and try our best to live the way we feel called to – our soul’s unique journey.  Maybe we have a special gift for the world and whilst we waste time trying to copy everyone else our gift is not being used or seen but remains hidden.

Here is a quote that encourages us to explore our individual gifts and the impact that has on us collectively:

‘Just as each of us has one body with many members, and these members do not all have the same function, so in Christ we who are many form one body and each member belongs to all others.  We have different gifts, according to the grace given us.  If a man’s gift is in prophesying, let him use it in proportion to his faith.  If it is serving, let him serve; if it is teaching, let him teach; if it is encouraging, let him encourage; if it is contributing to the needs of others, let him give generously; if it is leadership, let him govern diligently; if it is showing mercy, let him do it cheerfully.’

Romans Chapter 12 verses 3(b) to 8 in the Bible (New International Version)

It would be wonderful if we could all offer our gifts to the world before it is too late. Together we can have a big impact on our world.

If you consider that you will not be alive forever how do you feel?  What would you like to do with your time here on earth?  Are you concerned about what happens after death and does that impact on how you view your life?

Life is more interesting if we care about something and/or someone.  It starts with self-care otherwise we may not be around long enough to care for anyone or anything else.  But self-care alone can lead to a very narrow existence.

Care is more than meeting physical needs.  It could also be about our emotional, spiritual and financial needs.  Once we begin to care about one aspect of our life then we begin to notice the other areas we have been neglecting.  Again it is all about steps in the right direction not about trying to be perfect.

Many of us are so enamoured by celebrities that we expect them to spend all day dieting, exercising, exfoliating, massaging, shopping and dressing to radiate perfection.  How incredibly self-centred we expect them to be!  Or we expect them to roll out of bed looking perfect even though we have never found that for ourselves. Maybe we are so interested in how they look because it distracts us from ourselves.

When we take care of ourselves we will encourage others to do the same.  This could have a good impact on our friends and relations as we encourage them to look after themselves.  We might then begin to care about some aspect of our world.  With globalisation we are all more interconnected than ever whether that is food resources, financial markets, technology or the environment.  As such, caring for others is also in our best interest.

So, do you care about yourself?  Is there any one or any thing that you also care about?  Are you able to demonstrate this through what you do and say?  Or, do you care about nothing and don’t see the point?  Is there someone you can speak to or a book you can read?

There are great psychotherapists, philosophers, theologians and other social scientists who can share their perspectives with you.  This could be a start to finding your own passions. Let me know what you think.

Our bodies are so important to the pleasure we get out of life yet we often take them for granted.  It is so important that we look after our body and have a good relationship with it.  Many of us try to ignore the reality of being in a human body with all its associated miracles and frailties.

So many people take better care of their possessions than their bodies yet bodies are not replaceable.  This is not about beauty or expensive treatments but about the simple everyday task of looking after the container that carries us through the world.  It is about a healthy diet, exercise, relaxation and sleep.  Although there have been lots of fads in this area the core messages remain the same.  We know we need vegetables and fruits (in a range of colours); regular exercise and a good night’s sleep everyday.  We also need to drink plenty of water to keep us hydrated.  It was some years ago when I realized that I was not drinking enough water and the effect that would have on my body.  I am still not very good at this but it has improved.

Thankfully I like other healthy drinks such as herbal teas.  It is not about being perfect but minimizing the bad stuff we do to our bodies and maximizing the good stuff.  Like most things balance is also important and health is more about sensible moderation than extremes.  Of course there may be times when we struggle to make healthy choices but that does not mean we should give up or feel guilty but just use our awareness to help us to do our best.  It’s never useful to think in terms of all or nothing, every bit counts.

We know that smoking is bad for us and alcohol is best consumed in moderation. There are many other substances that can cause varying degrees of harm to our bodies and it is up to us what role these have in our lives.  A lot is said about the addictive qualities of harmful substances but I think some healthy foods can be addictive too.  I love healthy foods such as nuts, seeds, fruits and fish.  The responsibility is back to you and the habits that you form.

Our bodies are very sophisticated.  They can tolerate much neglect in our teens and twenties but if this continues then our bodies find ways of telling us that they are not happy (e.g. headaches, backaches).  From eyes to teeth we need to have regular check-ups to know what is going on in our bodies and what we should be doing to acquire or maintain good health.  As well as physical health our bodies also link in to our mental health and sense of wellbeing.  If we are in physical discomfort then it is challenging for us to feel upbeat about life.  We can take in foods that that affect our bodies in different ways: lifting our mood (chocolate), getting rid of bad stuff (antioxidants) and introducing good stuff (omega oils from oily fish and various seeds) for example.

You may need to learn to love the body you have been given and not compare it to others.  Sometimes it can be good to think of what your body can do (e.g. hike, run, swim, give birth) rather than how it looks.  You may have more serious body issues that are linked with mental health concerns and I would suggest you seek help for this.  Eating disorders can be overcome. Whatever the case our bodies are key to our physical and, to some extent, mental health and we need to be taking notice of how they are functioning and what impact our attention or neglect is having.

How do you feel about your body and how you treat it?  Would you say that you value the body you have been given or are you more likely to be found neglecting or criticising it?   Do you expose your body to harm?  What might be your first step to looking after your body?

It is not just about attitude.  Our behaviour matters too.  There is no point in saying all the right things and then not following through with our actions.   Our behaviour is what the world sees of our heart.  The world sees our works and imagines what our heart is like.  Not only does our behaviour indicate who we are to others but also to ourselves.

Sometimes we like to delude ourselves and think that we are different from how we really are but our behaviour provides evidence of the choices we make. There is an old saying that action speaks louder than words.  This is difficult to dispute.  In Christianity the Bible says that by their fruits you shall know them.  Our fruits are what we give out to the world. That doesn’t mean rushing around and being showy – doing to be noticed and praised.  It is about connecting our behaviour to our attitude and being true about how we are working our way through the challenges that life presents.

How can we show who we are by what we do?  Do you find you behave in ways that surprise you? Maybe you are doing things you do not really want to do or not doing things that you long to do? Would you like to explore what this means for you?  It could be linked to something that happened in the past or something that is happening in your life now.  Who can you talk to about this?